What Survivor can teach us about Alliances

I was recently on a call with a client, and we got to talking about Survivor, now in its 41 season(!) and how the creation of allies (and adversaries) has been a consistent factor in who makes it, and doesn’t make it, to the finale.

One of the mistakes that some contestants make, and that we sometimes make in real life, is underestimating our opportunities to create alliances. If we assume that forming a mutually beneficial bond with some people is limited, we miss out. Instead, stay open and curious: “I wonder how we might become better aligned?”

You will see that opportunities abound once you move past the assumption that relationships are fixed, and see that alliances can be formed within a team, and across interdependent teams. For example, the colleague who is seemingly hostile may be really afraid his input is not wanted. Once you demonstrate how much his input is valued and his advice welcomed, he’s on board. This makes for more team inclusion; we all perform better when we have positive relations through an intentional alliance.

The show’s successful survivors have all understood another important thing about alliances. Allies are not our friends. A colleague can support you until it means he risks losing his job. In other words, whereas close friends have an unconditional bond, alliances are very much conditional. Once we appreciate the part that allies play in our life, we are less inclined to become personally offended and more inclined to reassess the value of that alliance. Any fan of Survivor has seen how casually alliances are dissolved; the result is the “blind sided” castaway that confused friendship with their “value” to the tribe.

Back in the real world, alliances can make a huge difference to connecting on a human level. We all have memories of when colleagues' ideas have poured out as a result of “safe” connections. Therefore, strive, whenever possible, to keep interests aligned. Think about people in your world who you’d like to improve your working relationship with; adversaries ready to be flipped. Once you show how your interests are aligned, boom, you’ve got yourself an alliance. 

What can get in the way of alliances are false assumptions or stories we make up about other people, and by the same token, assumptions that people may make up about us. And, as much fun as these “stories'' are for water cooler gossip, one of the biggest ways we can dilute our ability to influence is our failure to see so called adversaries as allies-in-the-making, 

So, take a page out of the Survivor handbook and look at the practice of forming alliances as a core part of your strategy to influence outcomes. Becoming more aligned not only improves your ability to influence, but also helps foster a positive team atmosphere.  

What’s Coming Up:

I have a free workshop coming up in January on Authentic Team Leadership. If stepping into a leadership role excites you as well as frustrates you, I’d love to have you join whatever date is easy for you. In the workshop I’ll demystify a few things about leadership and how you can remain your authentic self. Details for the workshop and times are available through Eventbrite. Here’s the link to sign up: Eventbrite

I hope this workshop will also inspire you to stick with your team leadership journey, for real this time. My upcoming Team Leadership Program is set to run in the week of January 24 to January 28, every lunch time from 12 to 1:15 pm.  Because you’ll be with a group of like-minded aspiring leaders, you’ll learn from each other as much as through my course content. Here’s the link from my website on the Team Leadership Program

If you have any questions about the program or anything else, please contact me